Older and Wiser

This weekend I played golf with Jake, a friend who recently turned eighty. He's had some back problems so he can't hit the ball the way he used to, but he's out there twice a week with his wife or with friends. And while the ball may not go as far as it once did, it usually flies straight as an arrow.

But it wasn't his golf game that impressed me. Jake is thoughtful about his life, wanting to live as full a life as he can. We talked about forgiveness: How do you forgive people who have deeply hurt those who are dearest to you? We talked about goal setting: Where, he asks, do I want to be in five years? We talked about the spiritual life: How do I get closer to God?

He's also genuinely interested in others, listening intently to anything I had to say, wanting to know about my life, my ideas, and my opinions. Which is another way of saying that he hasn't stopped and he won't stop learning. He still retains that sense of wonder in the sense of awe and in the sense of "I wonder...." Despite his age, he sees the world through young eyes.

Jake is cheerful, positive, fun to be around. He's also and most importantly wise. And while I didn't have him in mind for the character of John in my book Pears, Grapes, and Dates: A Good Life After Mid-Life, he's a real life example of what I had in mind. What a pleasure it was to spend time with him and what an inspiration for my own good life after mid-life.